My mate said that inviting him out at 2pm then at 4:30pm I have lunch with my business partner whilst he makes himself scarce for half an hour as it’s private. Then he comes back and we all party till 2am. Is… ditching him…

Are you tired of going out drinking and waking up absolutely fine in the morning? Tired of there never being enough jokes to catch? Tired of the same old “woo woo” and “vodka and coke”? Well for forever time only, you can party with Luke Jeffery. Where you will need a fisherman’s net to capture the sea of jokes he will bring. Where default drinks are a thing of the past and rum is consumed more often than a person breathing, and you will wake up feeling dreadful. Who else can offer such an experience? So good it will feel like you’ve been face fucked by a train. GUARANTEED!! So act now, to avoid disappointment. Just contact your local Maximumbanterltd store and reap all the rewards we can offer you. Thank you.

Hopefully every beverage I have today will contain rum.